Wednesday, August 31, 2011

This is bullshit.

    With my array of health problems, it's no big surprise that I have more than one Doctor. And having done this since I was about three years old, I'm no stranger to medical procedures. Yesterday I made an appointment with my regular Doctor. Not my Neurologist, not my therapist, not the school nurse, just my regular Doctor. 
    So, I made the appointment because I've not been feeling too well the past couple of days. My throat looks like a red swollen puss filled volcano, I have a constant headache, I've been going to bed earlier than a senior citizen, and I'm in a constant state of nausea and irritability. Also, I had to get blood drawn. 
    When I got there, this is what went down: I went to the lab, got my blood drawn, and had a nice conversation about vampires with the person who was taking my blood. Is that ironic? I think so. Then, since I had to receive a throat swab they sent me back into the lobby where a found a very informative book about Princesses. Fifteen minutes later, they call me in, do all the normal stuff when you get a check up, and after about a million years, swab my throat. 
     He leaves, and a good half an hour passes- I don't mind, I'm reading my book. The nurse who took the swab said he would be back in maybe five or ten minutes. Finally, my stepfather is tired of waiting and comes to get me. Just as we're leaving the nurse comes up and tells me I don't have strep and nothing's wrong. Which is crazy, because pain like this isn't fucking normal. It shouldn't hurt your throat when you sneeze, that's all I'm saying. 
     Then he wants to go get me my AVS (after visit summary) to help me with what I can do to take care of my throat. My thinking is, at least they'll tell me how to get rid of it or treat it or whatever. I should be so lucky. 
     I get the AVS and it tells me how to take care of two things: Common Cold Symptoms and Cough. I don't have either of those. My throat looks like a swollen red landscape with snow covered hills- chances are I probably have strep throat. Anyway, I'm waiting for my mother to come home so she can take a look at it, she was a paralegal at a medical malpractice firm. Apparently that makes her like, a medical savant. Maybe she'll have an idea about what it looks like.

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